Using the momentum of a widely celebrated change (I'm talking about that ol' calendar shift into a new year) many of us set goals or resolutions, and --as social media loves to point out--we often lose our way by March. Does this feel true? I bet you have a few examples from your own life where this happened.
Sometimes, I think we have it backwards in goal setting (and in life). We spend a lot of time thinking about what we want to have first and then try to do enough to make it happen. Eventually, we start to feel like it is pointless or lose our focus. It's because we started at the end of the process!
The very first step is to figure out who we want to BE.
The Be-Do-Have model of goal setting is not mine and it is not new! Steven Covey introduced this idea in his book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. I heard about it from my mentor and it's all over the internet. It sticks around because it helps: shift our energy flow, hone our focus, and prepare us with deep connection (and motivation) to our end goal.
Before you write down your goals, ask yourself who you want and need to be in order to get what you want? What kind of person already has success in the area you want to improve? What are the traits of these successful people? Really spend time answering these questions and visualizing (maybe even researching) what characteristics and traits you will need to get what you want. Answer these questions so you can decide what kind of person you will need to become, and if that person aligns with your values, and help you figure out the actions needed in the "do-ing" stages.
Do you need more discipline? Do you need focus? Do you need to work on patience (like me)?
When we make the "having" stage more important to us, we can easily get trapped in a victim mindset. We overlook our personality quirks that repel our dreams. If having is all we think about, we won't be ready for our success even if it showed up overnight. Think about people who become successful with a hit song and then disappear. Perhaps one of the reasons it happened is because they didn't become who the needed to be before they had a huge end result. Think about people who inherit riches and then run it all into the ground.
Figuring out who you need to be will help you figure out action steps AND help you hold on to success when it arrives.
Zig Ziglar:
“You’ve got to BE before you can do and DO before you can HAVE.”
Goal setting is an art form. Changing our lives from a life we muddle through to a life of action and zest takes purposeful intention! If you need help, join my 6-week Goal Setting Block Party. I'll take you through all the steps you'll need, give you a community that will help provide loving accountability, be a sounding board, a troubleshooter, and help you develop the traits you need to BECOME! Plus...it will be fun. Monday nights at 7pm EST--online--starting Jan. 9.
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